Archive for the ‘Complaints’ Category

Service of Summer Prep Similar to Winter During a Pandemic: It’s Relative

Thursday, July 23rd, 2020

Photo: galmeetsglam.com

As millions of people around the world suffer from unrelated-to-the-pandemic health and economic issues I point out a microscopic bother and am ashamed.

One of the many things I love about summer is walking out the door not having to put on a sweater, coat, scarf, mittens and earmuffs/hat.

Photo: artofmanliness.com

Leaving my apartment is no longer carefree. I don a mask, once I’ve found it, and plastic gloves and tie the laces on my outdoor pandemic sneakers that live by the front door. If I’ve covered my hair with a scarf on a bad hair month I remove it to secure my mask strings and put it back on. When I come home I try to remember to leave my outdoor shoes by the door.

Since apartment management requires residents and guests to wear a mask I take advantage of an outing to coordinate garbage runs so I don’t need to get Covid-gussied for the ramble down the hall to the trash room with bags of wet, paper and plastic.

As I left my apartment today, another resident at the end of the hall saw me coming. He threw up his arms and turned on his heels to return to his apartment. He’d forgotten his mask. Even after all these months it can happen.

These little inconveniences that remind me of winter prep are nothing compared to the 780 million who have no access to improved water sources according to cdc.gov and the 2.5 billion who “lack access to improved sanitation.” The World Health Organization identifies regions with lowest improved sanitation [latest stats from 14 years ago reflecting priority] are sub-Saharan Africa and Southern and Eastern Asia. “Unsafe drinking water, inadequate availability of water for hygiene, and lack of access to sanitation together contribute to about 88% of deaths from diarrheal diseases.” Let’s hope the situation has improved.

While we are focused on the pandemic what is happening to these and other sufferers?

Has the pandemic discombobulated you? Have you inadvertently left home without your mask? Do you feel ashamed mentioning small inconveniences when there continue to be so many fundamental, achingly horrific wrongs in the world?

Photo: timesofisrael.com

Service of Complaining: It Can Feel Good But Does It Do Any Good?

Monday, January 27th, 2020

Photo: thebosshow.com

I love to complain which no doubt is why I’ve written this blog twice a week for a dozen years. Once I’ve identified what’s really bothering me, which often happens after griping about it, I usually move on. No goody-goody two shoes here: I’ve carried some big injuries or affronts for years but as for the day-to-day grumps I can shed most and move on using my mother’s mantra: “Bury the bone but remember where you’ve buried it.” [After I’d produced a string of gripes she’d ask, with a tone of irritation: “anything else?” I often ask the same question to myself today.]

Micaela Marini Higgs lined up a bunch of evidence on the subject in her New York Times article, “Go Ahead and Complain. It Might Be Good for You.” The operative word is might. “Constantly complaining can be an easy way to frustrate our confidantes, but there is research that shows it can also be a useful tool in bonding and helping us process emotions like stress and frustration.” Higgs quoted Robin Kowalski, a professor of psychology at Clemson University: “In short: Yes, it’s good to complain, yes, it’s bad to complain, and yes, there’s a right way to do it.”

Photo: thebalancingcareers.com

Higgs described three varieties of complaint: venting, problem solving and ruminating/dwelling. She reported: “Knowing which behavior you’re engaging in, and with what purpose, can help you put in place habits that will not only make your complaining much more strategic, but also help improve your emotional health and build stronger relationships with the people around you.”

Warned Margot Bastin at the department of School Psychology and Development in Context at the Belgian university KU Leuven, “Making complaining the primary focus in our relationships can make us dwell on our problems for longer, triggering a stress response. Bonds built over mutual dissatisfaction can also prove brittle once one person’s problem has been resolved.”

It’s normal to complain because, as Higgs observes, life isn’t perfect. Kowalski said “Inhibiting the disclosure of our dissatisfaction ‘can produce a negative effect,’ because it not only stops us from naming our problem but also prevents us from getting to the root of it.”

Higgs quoted Tina Gilbertson, a psychotherapist and the author of “Constructive Wallowing.” She said: “complaining is, ideally, totally solutions focused.” Quoting Dr. Grice Higgs continued “Though venting is not as focused on solving problems, ‘there are also really positive benefits,’ because it allows us ‘to get things out in the open and get our feelings heard so they don’t build up and cause stress.’” Angela Grice is a speech language pathologist specializing in the use of mindfulness-based practices. She “previously researched executive functions and neuroscience at Howard University and the Neurocognition of Language Lab at Columbia University.”

Photo: crosswalk.com

Other benefits of blowing off steam Higgs noted in her article include helping put the gripe in perspective and “words to our feelings;” it’s good both psychologically and emotionally; feedback helps gain perspective and the hope is that you’ll do something about the situation.

According to the experts in the article you want to avoid “always find[ing] something to complain about. The same goes with rehashing a problem over and over again, whether with friends or in the echo chamber of the internet.” Keeping a journal helps blow off steam about smaller complaints.

Has anyone stopped you from venting or criticized you for doing so? Do you find complaining constructive in getting over irritations and finding solutions to them? Is there a difference between a complaint and a critique or review of a restaurant experience or seminar for example?

Photo: verywellmind.com

Service of Citizen’s Arrest

Thursday, January 25th, 2018

Photo: steelturman.typepad.com

I’ve lost count of the times I’ve said out loud, sometimes to no one in particular “I wish I could make a citizen’s arrest!” When I told my husband the subject of this post he suggested I check out just what this would entail, “because,” he added, “everyone uses that expression and they may not know.”

So a quick detour before I share my targets. According to criminal.findlaw.com, in a Breaches of the Peace section: “In general, people can’t use citizen’s arrests for misdemeanors unless the misdemeanor involves a breach of the peace. Even in these circumstances, however, individuals can only make arrests when they have personally witnessed the criminal behavior and the breach has just occurred or there is a strong likelihood that the breach will continue.”

Photo: youtube

In its conclusion: “Every individual is empowered to arrest wrongdoers in certain circumstances, but individuals looking to make a citizens arrest act at their own risk. Not only is the act of apprehending a criminal inherently dangerous, but failure to meet the legal requirements for a citizens arrest could have devastating consequences for the person making the arrest.”

I trust that you don’t take me literally and that you realize I write out of exasperation. It’s helpful to let off steam once in a while in a benign way and not make life miserable for others as some of my fellow citizens are prone to do.

Photo: nyc.streetsblog.org

The most recent affront that awoke the policewoman in me was made by a delivery truck driver for a well known brand who leaned on his horn when there was nothing the vehicles in front of him could do to move out of his way. Nobody was walking in front of him; no car was cutting him off, yet he polluted the air and turned the time we all shared with him on that street into earsplitting misery.

Joining him on my hit list are the

***selfish subway passengers who won’t let me either in or out of a train

***bicyclists who miss me by a hair when they are driving in the wrong direction, zooming past me against the light or whisking past me on the sidewalk

***impatient drivers who ignore oncoming pedestrian traffic and swerve into avenue or street while endangering all those crossing an avenue

***bus drivers who use their airbrakes with abandon even when they know incoming passengers, some frail, aren’t yet holding on or settled in seats. Note: In some busses it’s quite a distance between the MetroCard fare collecting machine and strap or seat.

***drivers who won’t pull over and stop for an ambulance to pass: Don’t they realize their sister, mother, child, spouse or nephew might one day be inside?

An arrest for the following infractions would be too harsh—maybe I’d just give a warning for

***people who bump into me and don’t apologize

***elevator passengers who let the door slam in my face or who don’t offer to hit my floor when my hands are full

Are there infractions or violations to living in crowded places in a civilized way that you would hit with a citizen’s arrest or warning if you could?

Photo: dreamstime.com

Service of Keeping a Lid on Grievances: Cripple the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau’s Consumer Complaint Database

Monday, July 31st, 2017

Photo: funusualsuspects.com

You may want to take a quick look at the Consumer Complaint Database maintained by the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau [CFPB] before it joins rolled-back EPA regulations and watchdogs that once protected American consumers that are severely relaxed or gone. The goals are the same: Make it easier and cheaper to conduct [big] business, in this case, for banks.

You’d read on the website: “Each week we send thousands of consumers’ complaints about financial products and services to companies for response. Those complaints are published here after the company responds or after 15 days, whichever comes first. By adding their voice, consumers help improve the financial marketplace.”

Photo: consumerfinance.gov

Copy on the home page continues: “By submitting a complaint, consumers can be heard by financial companies, get help with their own issues, and help others avoid similar ones. Every complaint provides insight into problems that people are experiencing, helping us identify inappropriate practices and allowing us to stop them before they become major issues. The result: better outcomes for consumers, and a better financial marketplace for everyone.”

Yuka Hayashi addressed the issue in her Wall Street Journal article, “Battle Is On Over Government’s Version of Yelp for Banks -White House says government complaint database is unfair to banks, but consumers say it can spur action.”

Photo: techsgig.com

She wrote, “Responding to calls from industry groups, the Treasury Department in June recommended restricting access to the data to federal and state regulators.” She reported that since it was founded in 2011, consumers have filed 800,000 complaints the public can see, 1.2 million in all.

“The dispute highlights areas of friction as the Trump administration and other Republicans consider rolling back rules put in place after the financial crisis,” she wrote. “Those pushing for loosened rules say removing onerous and costly requirements would encourage more lending and economic growth. Opponents say such changes would bring back reckless behavior that caused the financial crisis.”

Photo: salon.com

A St. Paul social worker asked his student loan company to lower his monthly payments and after four to five tries, the temporary solution increased his monthly bill Hayashi reported. Two days after he posted a complaint on the CFPB complaint database, they sent him “several repayment options.” The social worker credits the CFPB.

Hayashi wrote that the Treasury Department felt the site “subjects companies to unwarranted reputational risk.” However, she continued, “Consumer advocates and some financial-services experts… say that the portal’s public nature is what gives it teeth.

What do banks think? “The bureau has failed to address the significant problems in the accuracy, integrity and usefulness of the information reported in the database,” Virginia O’Neill, senior vice president at the Center for Regulatory Compliance at the American Bankers Association told Hayashi.

Did you know you could post complaints about dealings gone south with a financial institution? Have you had a nasty banking issue? Do you believe that the complaints on the Consumer Complaint Database should be hidden from the public or allowed to be seen, as they have been for six years?

Addendum: In The Wall Street Journal’s August 7th issue, Andrew Ackerman wrote “A Republican-backed effort to overturn a rule making it easier for consumers to sue banks has hit a snag: the Senate.

“At issue is a Consumer Financial Protection Bureau rule approved in July barring fine-print requirements that consumers use arbitration to resolve disputes over financial services. The rule makes it easier for consumers to join class-action lawsuits against banks and credit-card companies. Though fiercely fought by the financial industry, it is set to go into effect in March.”

In addition: ” However, support in the Senate is uncertain. No Democrats are likely to back the effort, and Republicans, with their slim majority, can’t afford to lose more than two GOP votes. Several Republican senators have expressed reservations about voting to overturn the regulation, worried they may be portrayed as siding with banks and against consumers.”

This is something so easily lost among all the distractions for consumers to keep an eye out for.

Photo: survivalkit.com

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