Service of Money & Its Impact On Relationships with a Relative, Friend and Neighbor
April 24th, 2023
Categories: College, Debt, Loans, Money, Neighbors, Tuition

Image by Louise Dav from Pixabay
Money was at the root of three of four questions that Philip Galanes answered in “Social Q’s” in The New York Times last week. Each involved people who were unrealistic about other people’s circumstances. One paid the price and two were tone deaf about others’ financial challenges.
- A mother wanted advice about what to do. Her daughter had $100,000 in college loans that ma had co-signed. Meanwhile the mother was divorced and wanted to buy a house so she expected the kid to take over the loan. The daughter, a fine arts major making $18/hour at a restaurant, refused to take responsibility.
- Another was a woman who paid a $400/year theater subscription because her friend was experiencing hard times. As the woman’s husband had found a job the writer wanted to know if she should now ask for half the cost of the subscription.
- The last was from a person whose neighbor’s home badly needed painting. Painters refreshed three sides of the peeling house. They then stopped, packed up and left. The wall facing the writer remained an eyesore.
I suggest that all three writers reaped what they had planted. Of the mother Galanes asked, did she really think that a fine arts major was going to be able to pay off $100,000? He also wondered why the father hadn’t shared the financial burden. I agree with the Times columnist.
He told the second woman that just because her friend’s husband was now employed didn’t mean that she didn’t continue to have financial challenges and if the money didn’t mean that much to her and she enjoyed her friend’s company at the shows, to pay and not mention the imbalance. I suspect that when she can, the friend will pay her half.
Seems that the people who own a second home that they fully remodeled in a beach community with modest houses none of which had such a do over didn’t look around them. Clearly their neighbors didn’t have similar deep pockets. She wrote Galanes: “When my husband asked our neighbor when she planned to finish the job, she said she ran out of money. Am I wrong to be annoyed? It can’t cost that much to paint one side of a house.” I say kudos to the neighbors who didn’t spend more money than they have. And I bet the whiner thought she was getting a bargain where she bought her house. So much for that.
Do you have examples of people who have issues or misunderstandings with others over money?

Image by David Mark from Pixabay