Service of Icy Hosts

October 5th, 2026

Categories: Brutality, Deportation, Detention, immigrant

A friend shared a horrendous story the highlights of which I post here. Like the protagonist, my father was a legal immigrant with green card for many years, but I would hope anyone reading what happened to this man recently would shudder regardless of personal proximity to an immigrant.

The nightmare began with a knock on the door—the man and his wife were sleeping–in a southern city where they had retired. In his 70s—tall, thin, dark brown skin and an accent—he had been in the country for 35 years. He and his American wife have two kids, one a doctor the other a lawyer. Soon after his detainment he was sent to a jail in another city. In this prison he contracted pneumonia and barely survived a stint in the ICU only to be sent back to prison in a room with seven others.

Before I go on, some context.

Beth Schwartzapfel and Anna Flagg reported in The Marshall Project in August, 2026 … “even as Trump’s enforcement upends lives and livelihoods in immigrant communities, the number of people detained and deported falls far short of the president’s goal of deporting 1 million people per year.

“In total, since Trump’s inauguration last year, ICE has detained over 610,000 people — more than the population of Atlanta, Baltimore, Milwaukee or the entire state of Wyoming.”

According to the headline for a June, 2025 article by David J. Bier of the Cato Institute, “65 Percent of People Taken by ICE Had No Convictions, 93 Percent No Violent Convictions.”

Back to this unfortunate man who finally had a hearing at the end of September.

My friend wrote: “His crime? He made a mistake on his yearly green card application four years ago. The subsequent three years were correct.  So he was sentenced to return to his country of origin. He does have a brother there who will help.”

I interrupt the narrative to point out that we shrug at people in office with far worse “crimes” than once making a mistake on paperwork.

To continue, this is how we treat people we deport.

My friend wrote, “he was taken from the prison in one town to the airport in another wearing prison pajamas and no socks or shoes. He was put in a holding pen with quite a few other men. Hours of no food or water or toilets and he wasn’t able to bring anything that was in his suitcase. On the plane still with no shoes or socks. This is what a law- abiding person with a legal right to be here gets for a ‘mistake’ on an application that no one told him about four years ago.”

The man had “all sorts of legal help as well as his congressman,” wrote my friend. Could his treatment have been worse? I guess. Originally, he was slated to be sent to one of two countries with no connection to him where he didn’t speak the languages.

Is there any rationale or excuse for such inhumane treatment of innocents or any prisoners?

Service of Air Pollution

October 1st, 2026

Categories: Automobiles, Pollution

Decades ago, we were in a severe traffic jam outside Orly Airport. The plan was to return our rental car after a glorious vacation and catch a flight home.

After a while our eyes started to tear up and we were coughing so we closed the windows. We were spoiled by the clean air standards that had been adopted in the States and were shocked at how quickly we reacted to the exhaust. France hadn’t yet taken such steps.

This memory haunted me when I read about the administration’s reversal of federal fuel economy standards that may “increase carbon dioxide emissions by roughly 50% and worsen local air pollution,” according to AI.

The rationale is to lower the price of vehicles, a tempting if short-term gain and a big price to pay. It mocks the congestion pricing program NYC implemented to lower pollution and untangle gridlock.

Are you willing to pay a little more for your next car to maintain the goal of fuel efficiency from 50 miles per gallon, which it is now, to 34.9 by 2031?

Service of Tricky Friendships

September 28th, 2026

Categories: Charity, Compassion, Ethics, Friendship, Stealing

“My Friend Pocketed the Money From Our Charity Event. What Should I Do?,” was the headline of a recent New York Times Ethicist column.

The reader wrote: “My friend took the lead on creating wonderful things for us to sell (in addition to regular donations), and we advertised heavily about the charity we were fund-raising for, which energized everyone to contribute more because of how relevant it felt.”

They didn’t create a bank account for the event and the friend said he’d deposit the money in his account. The fellow subsequently lost his job and ghosted her for a year when she reached out to get back the money.

The reader concluded with these questions for columnist Kwame Anthony Appiah: “What do I owe my friend and what do I owe everyone who donated? Should I, being fortunate enough to have a well-paying job, suck it up and donate the amount myself? Should I let the friendship die, knowing that he essentially stole from a charitable cause?”

A partial excerpt of Appiah’s advice: “Your compassion for your friend is admirable, but personal misery isn’t an excuse for robbing a charity. Nor should you continue to conceal his misconduct in order to preserve your friendship. This man hasn’t just failed to pay up; he has betrayed everyone who organized the event and trusted him to send the money on, and he has let down everyone who bought something or donated, as well as the cause you were all supporting.”

Have you run into a thorny situation like this?

Service of Self Storage 2

September 24th, 2026

Categories: Seasons, Storage

The top four drawers of the mule chest are faux. The chest opens from the top. The chest holds a ton of clothes.

Tis the season for those who live in small spaces with too many clothes to make the dreaded seasonal changeover. My antique mule chest will hold my summer clothes once I remove them from the closet to make room for the winter things currently inside. I try to give away some clothes on each such occasion but never enough.

Our last moves from a house and large apartment to a small apartment in two months was like taking apart a Russian nesting doll, from bigger to smaller, at high speed. As I mentioned in an April 2019 post, my husband suggested we consider putting some things in storage. I was determined not to do that because I doubted that we’d move to a larger apartment or to a country house anytime soon or ever.

Kousha Navidar, guest host of The Brian Lehrer Show on WNYC interviewed New Yorker staff writer David Owen, who had written an article about self-storage. Navidar called the segment “What’s in Your Storage Locker?” The cliff note summary of Owen’s article from AI: It “frames self‑storage as a modern American ritual, parallel to religion, driven by accumulation and the desire to ‘hold’ possessions without using them.” In the interview Owen listed the D reasons for using the storage units: Death, Displacement, Divorce, Downsizing and Delusion that children will want stuff.

A friend uses units to store thousands of books. I never asked if she or her husband visits them. We gave away ours. Ouch. Thank goodness for e-books.

I think the units have their place for short periods as a bridge while waiting for a closing on a house or condo. Otherwise, bite the bullet. It’s no fun to leave behind favorite things. I’m the worst at it. But currently I have enough around that makes me happy and I’m grateful.

Do you use storage units?

Service of Don’t Do What Meghan Did

September 21st, 2026

Categories: Loyalty

In an attempt to follow a news story that doesn’t make my heart sink–hard to do these days–I’ve been weaving in and out of the Meghan/Harry move back to the UK saga on social media—especially the Meghan part.

I wondered if I only saw negative coverage because of some algorithm and checked with AI. I hadn’t been misled. Here’s what it said: “Mainstream British press outlets are overwhelmingly critical or sensationalist regarding Meghan Markle, with virtually no major UK newspaper or tabloid adopting a consistently pro-Meghan stance.”

I could have told her where she dug her hole and why she’s disliked. It’s never a good idea to knock your loved one’s country of origin even if he isn’t a member of the royal family. It can’t be so great on a personal level but to blab about your dislike publicly…ouch.

Mom’s many French friends used to tease her. They’d say they didn’t know who/what she loved more: Her French husband or France. Long after dad died, she returned to France every year for about a month, well into her 80s. If she’d had the energy, she could have met her friends, their children and grandchildren three meals a day. She was American, not always a favorite nationality of citizens of La République française. Her loyalty to their compatriot and country—and upbeat personality–did the trick.

Meghan didn’t have to go as far as mom, but she should have zipped her lip. There are millions of mixed marriages, some religious, others that combine spouses from different countries. My unsolicited advice to them is don’t do what Meghan did. Your thoughts?

Service of Ai Yi Yi 

September 17th, 2026

Categories: Uncategorized

We take a lot for granted and depend on the expertise of others. We believe that a restaurant keeps a clean kitchen, and cooks know the difference between rat poison and sugar; a car repair service’s experts fix brakes; clinicians develop safe and effective vaccines, and a doctor knows how to read an MRI.

That’s why I can only line up on the issue of AI with those who either themselves are steeped in the subject or others with topnotch advisors. Many urge for an immediate heads up.

A loud voice declaring “Hoax,” with no information backing the word, uttered from a person who does no research and doesn’t listen to those who do, doesn’t give me confidence.

When the lineup on the other side is impressive, and urges us to stop to assess, check the development of something that could lead to what Bernie Sanders called “catastrophic consequences,” I’m with them. The fellow who previously suggested a spoonful of Clorox could cure Covid doesn’t impress.

In addition to Sanders, Steve Bannon raises a red flag. Amanda Castro quoted Bannon in a Newsweek article: “by calling AI ‘the defining issue of our time,’ insisting the country must ‘slow down the pace’ before the technology outstrips human oversight.”

They are joined by the heads of AI companies urging a slowdown. Max Zahn wrote for ABCnews.com, “Anthropic CEO Dario Amodei published a blog post alerting the public to ‘serious’ risks. Sam Altman, chief executive at rival firm OpenAI, in a post on X acknowledged AI could go ‘very badly.’

“The head of xAI, Elon Musk, echoed that view, referring to a post on X from 2014 in which he said AI could prove more dangerous than nuclear weapons.”

Few dispute that AI has tremendous potential for the benefit of, for example, medical research and business efficiency. But that is not the focus of this post.

What do you think? Is the hullabaloo over AI a hoax or should we take a breath to assess before it’s too late?

Service of What Went Wrong?

September 14th, 2026

Categories: Deli, Food, Online Delivery, Unreliable

I am surprised by what I expect to be a topnotch retail experience that disappoints.

Sandwich

I ordered a ham and Swiss on whole wheat with butter at a neighborhood high end food emporium. I learned that they only use rolls and the sandwich maker suggested I buy a loaf of whole wheat—available at the bakery section nearby–and he’d make the sandwich with that. I went with the roll. Next, he said he had no butter. The store sells a large selection of butter. Seemed strange that the sandwich maker at a boutique food emporium didn’t have standard ingredients at hand in midtown Manhattan.

Delivery

A few things I’d ordered on Amazon arrived as scheduled. Missing was the thing I needed right away. I checked the order online to learn that it wouldn’t arrive for 15 days. I was disappointed that Amazon hadn’t warned me to begin with. I’d have cancelled the order.

It’s an item I can’t find in neighborhood stores. I found another online source that carried it and checked it out—it had good ratings. But it didn’t tell me when the order would arrive. I ordered it anyway. In the confirmation it said it would ship in one or two days. Not soon enough so I found something like it–but not as good–in a store a few bus stops away. The second online order arrived in two days.

What reputable brands are still reliable?

Service of a $5,000 Windfall

September 10th, 2026

Categories: Bribe, Windfall

In the day that retail stores closed on Sunday, one Saturday there was a grandfather who promised his young grandson a visit to FAO Schwarz the next day if he’d finish his dinner. The child complied. He was devastated when they arrived at the store the next day to find it closed.

Assuming the president isn’t like the grandfather, and he knows where the $trillion to cover the promise will come from, we’ll each receive $5,000 if the midterm elections give Republicans the House and Senate. I thought it would be fun to fantasize about what I’ll do with my bribe.

He said we’d have to spend the money in the U.S. I wonder how he’ll keep track? If I take $5,000 out of savings to buy airfare to Europe and deposit the $5K into my account, am I in the clear?

Can I pay off a year’s worth of insurance premiums? Debt? Rent?

Must I keep receipts of my purchases?

Does donating some to charity count?

Will children receive $5,000? Can they deposit their handout into a college fund?

Have you ever promised something you knew you couldn’t fulfill? What would you do with a $5,000 handout? Do you think such a promise will get people to vote Republican? Is it enough money to soften the blow for Democrats?

Service of Where Were You?

September 7th, 2026

Categories: Fear, Memories

As we approach 9/11’s 25th anniversary it’s hard not to think of that shocking day—especially for New Yorkers I suspect—recalling where we were that morning and when we learned about the devastation.

I would normally have been at work but I had a 9:30 appointment in Grand Central Terminal to meet clients. We were going to see what a magazine had done with the client’s products in a decorative installation in Vanderbilt Hall.

I was at the bathroom sink when I heard the hosts of a morning radio show report that they’d just seen a plane crash into the World Trade Center. As I rushed to turn on the TV I called out to Homer who was working in his home office. We were standing in front of the TV when the second plane hit.

I left to meet the clients—I lived a few blocks from the station. The sky was pristine blue. We were in the installation with the editors when we were asked to leave the station. A plane had just hit the Pentagon. Now we were even more alarmed.

My clients walked me home to 35th street and proceeded downtown to their offices.

Homer accompanied me to my office on West 44th Street to pick up some work. Madison Avenue was filled with people walking uptown. Nobody spoke.

We saw the top of the Chrysler building from our bedroom. The city lights were turned off—including the building’s iconic art deco necklace—so the city would be less of a target for additional attacks.

The events were so shocking that I didn’t touch the work I brought home. Such paralysis had never happened for me even after the deaths of my parents. Intrepid New Yorkers who never flinched at a siren or jumped at a backfiring truck became on alert all the time.

In a way we are going through a similarly shocking patch in slow motion watching as lives are lost and citizens suffer. A New York Times article by Luke Broadwater and Maggie Haberman sheds some light. The headline and subhead: “As War Grinds On, Trump Relishes Renovation Projects–President Trump is basking in the momentum of the various projects he has spurred around downtown Washington.” Are these projects a modern-day version of the mythical violin that Nero played in 64 AD as the Eternal City burned?

Why is it that we tend to remember the supremely sad days and not so much the moments in which we’ve been lauded or told good news? Where were you on 9/11?

Why don’t I get it? That Political Candidates with the Biggest War Chests Win

September 3rd, 2026

Categories: Elections, Political Campaign, Vote

I usually know who I am voting for long before an election and nothing short of a legit scandal will change my mind.

This is why I am puzzled why so often it is the candidate with the biggest war chest that wins.

He/she can stuff my mailbox with postcards or cause me to grab for my remote when the zillionth political TV commercial pops on my TV screen either attacking the opponent or showing the person hugging children or seniors. It won’t change my mind.

The New York Times article by Shane Goldmacher and Theodore Schleifer that made me decide to write again about this enigma is “Millions of Dollars in Secret Spending Could Upend the 2026 Midterms–At least $1 billion from anonymous donors is flowing into the midterm elections. Dark money is not new, but it now permeates nearly every major contest.”

This may be a legitimate issue –as is the idea that I support that there should be a limited amount permitted for every candidate to spend–but it doesn’t explain why smothering voters with marketing junk leads to a win. Who falls for the falderal?

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