Service of Expectations II

October 25th, 2012

Categories: Consideration, Expectations, Panic

A friend shared this instance with me–it’s about expectations and what can happen when they are not met.

Her husband had a doctor’s appointment at 1:30 and a date to visit friends at their apartment after that. At 5:30 the friends called her to find out where he was. Her heart stopped. She hadn’t heard from him all day and figured he was with them.

The back-story: The man had been sick for months and was weak but fiercely independent and insisted on going out and about alone. You can imagine what a shock this news of his seemingly falling off the earth’s face made to wife and friends. The latter had heard from him at 3 to say he hadn’t yet seen the doctor and that’s the last anyone heard.

I read a statistic that in 2011 there were 5.6 billion mobile phones in the world. Seems everyone has one regardless of age or financial status. Her husband did. He also refuses to turn his on, she explained, so that nobody can reach him that way. However, doctors offices also have phones that they would let a patient use.

Imaginations on fire, those in the dark panicked. Were they wrong? We have extraordinary means of communicating with ease these days and we expect that everyone takes advantage of them. Many find silence like this unusual. But do we over-communicate, setting ourselves up to be frightened when someone doesn’t?

6 Responses to “Service of Expectations II”

  1. Martha takayama Said:

    We have grown accustomed to the ease of communication with the array of choices available to us. Payphones are a thing of the past and any doctor or professional office staff person should be able to permit a local call.

    Furthermore the rising tide of unexpected violence or catastrophes that are reported all day long only heighten our sense of anxiety when expected communication is not forthcoming and a person behaves in an unexpected fashion. Therefore it is incredibly stressful to not be able to hear about changes of plans etc. The new world order and electronic options call for a new set of manners and consideration.

  2. Lucrezia Said:

    My policy is to make every effort to have no expectations one way or the other. Sometimes we are able to coax a person or situation into a desireable spot. If not, best to just sit back and await developments and go on from there. Why sweat the small stuff!

  3. Jeanne Byington Said:


    Consideration is the key word I’d say. However, if you’ve ever been as sick as this friend’s husband was, I don’t think a person has much energy to spare to be considerate of others.

  4. Jeanne Byington Said:


    If I could be like you, the acid in my stomach wouldn’t get such a workout. I’d have been in an asylum had this instance happened to me.

  5. Nancy Farrell Said:

    I’m still trying to get past the fact that the husband was still waiting 1 1/2 hours after his appointment was supposed to start. My doctor’s office would have called me to let me know he was running late. That is much better than watching me stew and risking me cancelling the appointment. Time to get a new doctor.

  6. Jeanne Byington Said:


    Speaking of expectations……..funny I skipped right over that important part of the story!

    Excellent advice.

Leave a Reply